Thursday, February 4, 2010


Last Saturday, January 30,2010, in the evening I noticed that Spencer's right pupil was significantly smaller than his left, and the right eyelid was droopy. I didn't feel like I needed to rush him the emergency room that night but I did not feel good about it at all. I knew that he had a dr.'s appt set up for Monday for a checkup on his headaches so I decided to wait until then. After a long day and a long wait at the dr.'s office our wonderful pediatrician took one look at his eye and told me to take him straight to the Primary Children's Hospital emergency room. I dropped very hungry and tired Gavin and Isabelle off to Nate and took Spencer in. On our way we stopped at Carls Jr. and got a bacon western cheeseburger and some onion rings, his favorite. Everyone in the ER was wonderful and we didn't wait long to talk to dr.s and nurses and get him in for a CT scan. When the ER doctor came in and explained the CT scan it was obvious from the pictures of the tumor. I have always thought that if something like this ever happened to me that I would stop functioning. It is amazing what you can get through. I didn't have another option for my son, than to be strong and brave. It is true that the Lord will not give you something that you cannot get through. There have been some low times so far but for the majority of the time there has been peace, lots of peace. We can feel your prayers surrounding our family and piercing our souls. The day after the ER we headed back up to Primary Children's Hospital to meet with our ENT Dr. Grimmer. He has been wonderful. He looked over the CT scans and believed the tumor to be a Rhabdomyosarcoma. We waited an emotional hour while Spencer soldiered through an MRI. MRI results yesterday confirmed the Rhabdomyosarcoma. Today we wait through a gruesome 2-3 hour invasive biopsy which will confirm the type of cells involved in the mutation, which will tell us the types of treatment that we will have to undergo as a family. We will post pictures and updates and physically and emotionally able. We love you and are thankful for all of your prayers and fasting.


  1. I'm constantly thinking about him! I pray that things will go as smooth as possible. Holly, you are being a superhero as well, keeping it together for Spencer. My thoughts are with you guys!

  2. Holly - I am so saddened to hear of your "interruption" of same 'ol, same 'ol -
    May I suggest you open a "Caring Bridge" account.It is a great place to post progress, pictures etc. and receive support on these kinds of things.

    I'm sure if you google it, you will see it and find it so helpful.
    Our prayers for you and yours,
    Brother and Sister Gassin

  3. Oh Holly, I am tearing up for what you are going through with your little Spence. If you ever need help with your other kids, I am in West Jordan and would love to help tend or anything! We will continue to keep Spencer in our prayers. Love and miss you.

  4. To my very Best Boy, Spencer!!! I love you with all of my heart and I will come to visit you very soon. We can play the pirate game. Do you want me to bring you a root beer or cream soda? YUMMY!
    Remember Heavenly Father is always nearby, all you have to do is ask Him to help you and He will because He loves you sooooooooooo
    much. Love and kisses galore, Neina

  5. I'll definitely be following your journey through this crazy time and can only wish for as easy of a time as possible. Lots of love to you, dear!!

  6. Holly, you may not remember that Chuck and I lost a son at age 12. I just want to encourage you and your family to keep your faith. You are so right that the Losrd gives us nothing we cannot handle and that has always helped me to get through the tough times. My heart and love are with you and I will keep Spencer and your family in my prayers every day.

  7. hi holly-
    i'm a friend of leslie kasahara and she sent me here to your blog. just want you to know that a complete stranger is thinking about you and your family during this incredibly difficult time and sending lots of good energy your way. i look forward to your post about how, thanks to all sorts of innovative treatment, spencer's tumor is GONE and he can continue being a happy, normal little boy.

  8. hi holly - while we didn't know each other well in high school, just want you to know that i'm thinking of spencer and your family. les pointed me to your blog, too! so funny to see jo's comment on here! jo and i went to college together (& she's the sweetest). i definitely have some catching up to do on spencer's story and i'll be following...


  9. friend of leslies.
    will be praying for you in CO.

  10. hi, i'm also a friend of leslie's... i am a devoted reader of her blog and she asked us to give you a shout out and some good energy & love. since les is a friend of yours, you must be a wonderful person and i can't imagine going through this with your family and son. i'll check back for his progress & i'll be crossing my fingers and toes for good news of spencer's story and pray that he gets better quickly!

  11. Hi Holly,
    I'm a friend of Leslie and Devon's, a fellow blogger, and a mom of a 2 yrs old boy; while I'm tearing up at the pain and heart break you're going through I'm also admiring the strength I know you're gathering to help your son and the rest of your family tackle this terrible challenge; little boys are amazingly tough, resilient creatures. Total stranger in Orange County is praying for you, and we're looking forward to hearing how Super Spencer kicked this.
    Sincerely, Courtney