Friday, February 26, 2010
Dear Abby,
What is the proper cancer etiquette? When I see someone in the store that I haven't seen in awhile and they ask "how are you?"do I answer, "I am doing well, how are you?" and go about my day? or do I say, "Crappy, my son has cancer",thus making for an awkward situation, and a bummer day. Why is it that our culture makes light of such a heavy question, "how are you?"?
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i think you should drop the C word....then take joy in taking everyone off guard! that is quite the response you have in your arsenal!
ReplyDeletei know for me i love giving very vague but obviously bad answers and then take notice that really no one is really wanting a response when you say something like that and they are really just ready to move on.
If I ran into you and didn't know about your situation and you didn't inform me, I would feel bad that I was acting all "normal" when things aren't. I would want to know so that I could include you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I think your response should be something like "Thing's have been better, Spencer has cancer." And then, have cards ready to hand out with an addy to your blog so you don't have to spend the next 1/2 hour to hour reliving everything.
ReplyDeleteBut, this is just my humble opinion. And heck, you guys could use all the extra thoughts and prayers, right?
I totally agree with Suzie! I would be hurt to find out that you didn't tell me what was really going on with your family. I guess it depends on how well you know the person and if you really want them to know or not. I think it might even be theraputic for you to say it.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean. Most people I run into already know that my husband has cancer, but if they don't, I tell them. Running into people can be both draining and healing. When I tell someone new, they always tell me that they will start praying for him and I believe them. I believe that there are people praying for Spencer and Uncle Kevin who haven't prayed in a long time or ever! How beautiful is that?!
ReplyDeleteI absolutely LOVE the CARD idea with your blog address on it. I'm on it Holly!! Will get some to you soon! LOVE YOU!
ReplyDeleteI hear ya on this one. it's been 11 years and i still don't know how to broach the subject. It's a conversation stopper. i prefer to save the truth for people who genuinely want/care to know it. i guess it depends on how long you want to talk to that person. LOL.
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